You never know what you have until it is gone

I have not blogged for months. Of course it is not that I have not learned anything it is about whether what I have learned can help anyone. As we begin a new school year and I see my son Connor, who is autistic, go out for football having never played I again learn a valuable lesson. We who are "normal" are always looking for what is around the corner. Or someone to give us permission to be us, then we take that and run with it, whether it is the right thing to do or not. We do not let our inner selves drive what we know is right. We over think and/or make justifications because we so want approval. We want someone to validate who we are. But we need to go with what we feel and when those who say they love us, do not support us, then we need to let them go. Connor lets his heart and determination drive what he wants to do. He sets his mind based on how he feels and then he does not let what others think or do affect how he pursues his goals.

His brother and I have let our pasts dictate who we are in our future. And we try to believe that when those who love us hurt us, they did not really mean it. Connor looks at the world in black and white and he always goes with what he sees not what he hopes to see. When we are young that is the way we see the world. However, as we grow older we actually create filters from reality based on what we want to see. As lawyers we learn that there are no right or wrong answers only good arguments.

However, in real life, there are right and wrong answers. And hopefully you figure that out before that thing, or opportunity, or person is gone. You never know what you have until you lose it, hopefully you never have to experience true loss because you did not see what was standing right before you.